There are times when life is just good - when the kids are loving and oddly compliant, when your husband is overly-attentive, when friends (with generally hectic schedules) are readily available, when God just seems nearer somehow. Sometimes they are fleeting moments, like when the I catch the kids singing to each other at nap-time after a particularly rough morning, and sometimes they seem to stretch on and on.
This is one of those golden times. Our dear neighbor, Alex, is visiting us from Seattle. She is an anomaly. She has the exuberance one might expect from a teenager but also demonstrates responsibility, emotional maturity, and selflessness that are well beyond her years. We love her!
I was a little nervous that her visit was to occur so near my due date. I didn't want to go into labor and have her feel awkward about moving in with my extended family. I also didn't want to miss out on time spent with her myself. Plus at 38 weeks pregnant, I was concerned I couldn't be an attentive hostess and that she would be bored.
Of course, God's timing is flawless. Jack has not arrived, and if Alex weren't here, I would be drumming my fingers, snappy with the kids, cleaning like mad, etc. Her visit has been just what the doctor ordered. I find myself letting little chores slide, playing quietly with the kids in the mornings while she sleeps (she is a teenager, after all), and relaxing.
In addition to having Alex here, the kids' behavior has been, well, odd. Not bad odd, wonderful odd. I don't know whether or not this is a reflection of my own relaxed attitude, but they are so cooperative and loving it's almost spooky. Some days I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. For example, yesterday morning, they played with the same puzzle [sharing it - *gasp*], for nearly 45 minutes. The would build it, break it, and giggle, "Wanna do it again?" I took a video [mostly to prove to myself later that it was not a hallucination].
I have such mixed emotions right now. There is a part of me that wants to press the Pause button, that doesn't want anything at all to change, that will miss having relaxed breakfasts listening to just 2 tiny voices sharing the adventures they had in their dreams the night before, having enough arms to encircle both little bodies as I read a favorite book, etc. Then there is the other part of me that can't wait for that other shoe [or baby, rather] to drop. I can't wait to walk and not waddle, to push the kids on the swing without getting winded, to smell an infant again, to introduce the kids to their brand new brother.
For right now, I am just trying to enjoy our Golden Age and recognize that "to every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven" (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
7/22/11
7/13/11
Shrawberry
Maddie's favorite blanket is covered in strawberries. It's kind of ironic, since she is extremely allergic to strawberries. She calls this beloved blanket, "Shrawberry."
She has loved "Shrawberry" since she was born. I used to rub it softly across her lips to help her fall asleep. Now she does that herself. She can't sleep without it. It is so worn, it has holes in it. She insists on taking it everywhere. It drags the ground, and has to be washed quite frequently (which often requires negotiation/bribery and still results in tears).
Today, I noticed her love of "Shrawberry" has been taken to a new level. She talks to it. Over breakfast, she was asking it if it liked cereal. It was in a heap on the floor (and didn't respond). I was grateful she didn't attempt to feed it, as that would have resulted in yet another washing. At naptime she informed me "Shrawberry" needed the nightlight on. Okay...
I understand talking to a doll or stuff animal, but a blanket? Strange.
7/4/11
Drawback
The only drawback of pregnancy that really gets under my skin is my weakness (or sometimes perceived weakness). There is a book called The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy in which the author describes a plethora of negative side effects of pregnancy...varicose veins, stretch marks, discomfort, etc. I can and have dealt with those types of things, many of which are permanent. Oddly, I am much more troubled by the temporary problems that pregnancy creates.
Lack of stamina, inability to bend at the waist [to weed the garden, for goodness sake!], need to sit frequently, inability to lift heavy objects, being discouraged from climbing ladders, etc. This is the stuff that makes me absolutely crazy! I hate being told that I have physical limitations. I suppose on some level it scares me. I realize that as I age, I will have more and more of them, but right now I am a healthy 30-something year old woman. Don't tell me I can't lift that chair!
Two events have triggered this rant: the gutter cleaning incident and the van leak. Allow me to explain...
There has been a tree growing in our gutter for months. A tree! Granted, it is a small tree, but come on! Our landlords sometimes post notices on their rent deposit box which read: Don't forget to clean out your gutters and change your air filters. I know it's paranoid, but I could swear they are referring to our little tree. It has bothered me for months. My husband is a busy man and does a great job keeping up with other tasks (mowing, bills, etc.). This weekend, I had finally had it. The gutter is on the edge of the garage (less than 10 feet from the ground). Our ladder is fiberglass and very lightweight. I easily maneuvered it outside and set it up (opened all the way, not leaning against the garage) right next to the gutter. I climbed up a few rungs, held onto a rung tight with one arm, and used a gloved hand to scoop out the debris in the gutter. Very simple. Then I made a big mistake...Proud of my accomplishment and eager to try out other, taller gutters on the house, I foolishly made a Facebook post. Unwilling to stand on the top of the ladder with nothing to grab but the house itself, I asked for a taller ladder. Well, needless to say, not everyone agreed with my activities. Due to all the negative (albeit caring) feedback, I simply deleted the post.
The second event occurred today. I realized I can't fix our van alone. Grrrr...
Last summer we discovered a putrid, moldy mess in the back where the seat had been folded down. Assuming it was the result of some wet (now moldy) towels left back there, I used every product known to man to get rid of the stuff. However, months later, the wet and mold had returned. We realized there must be an outside leak, took it in, and had the rear window seal replaced. Everything was fine for a time. Then I found the same mess after a very hard rain. I took it in again and was told that they would need to remove the interior panels to determine where the leak was coming from, as all the seals appeared to be working. That sounded costly. I decided we could save money by removing them ourselves. Heck, we have the ridiculously detailed illustrated repair manual, how hard could it be?
During the kids' nap, I decided to do it myself. Repair manual in hand, I unlocked the van and began taking the first steps. I got to about step 2 in which I was informed that 2 people are required to lift out the backseat. Foiled! You see, if I weren't pregnant, I would not have been deterred by this minor detail. What many deem a 2-person job can easily be turned into a 1-person job with a little ingenuity.
But not when you are pregnant. There are some things my body just won't let me do right now, and let me tell you, it really ticks me off!
Lack of stamina, inability to bend at the waist [to weed the garden, for goodness sake!], need to sit frequently, inability to lift heavy objects, being discouraged from climbing ladders, etc. This is the stuff that makes me absolutely crazy! I hate being told that I have physical limitations. I suppose on some level it scares me. I realize that as I age, I will have more and more of them, but right now I am a healthy 30-something year old woman. Don't tell me I can't lift that chair!
Two events have triggered this rant: the gutter cleaning incident and the van leak. Allow me to explain...
There has been a tree growing in our gutter for months. A tree! Granted, it is a small tree, but come on! Our landlords sometimes post notices on their rent deposit box which read: Don't forget to clean out your gutters and change your air filters. I know it's paranoid, but I could swear they are referring to our little tree. It has bothered me for months. My husband is a busy man and does a great job keeping up with other tasks (mowing, bills, etc.). This weekend, I had finally had it. The gutter is on the edge of the garage (less than 10 feet from the ground). Our ladder is fiberglass and very lightweight. I easily maneuvered it outside and set it up (opened all the way, not leaning against the garage) right next to the gutter. I climbed up a few rungs, held onto a rung tight with one arm, and used a gloved hand to scoop out the debris in the gutter. Very simple. Then I made a big mistake...Proud of my accomplishment and eager to try out other, taller gutters on the house, I foolishly made a Facebook post. Unwilling to stand on the top of the ladder with nothing to grab but the house itself, I asked for a taller ladder. Well, needless to say, not everyone agreed with my activities. Due to all the negative (albeit caring) feedback, I simply deleted the post.
The second event occurred today. I realized I can't fix our van alone. Grrrr...
Last summer we discovered a putrid, moldy mess in the back where the seat had been folded down. Assuming it was the result of some wet (now moldy) towels left back there, I used every product known to man to get rid of the stuff. However, months later, the wet and mold had returned. We realized there must be an outside leak, took it in, and had the rear window seal replaced. Everything was fine for a time. Then I found the same mess after a very hard rain. I took it in again and was told that they would need to remove the interior panels to determine where the leak was coming from, as all the seals appeared to be working. That sounded costly. I decided we could save money by removing them ourselves. Heck, we have the ridiculously detailed illustrated repair manual, how hard could it be?
During the kids' nap, I decided to do it myself. Repair manual in hand, I unlocked the van and began taking the first steps. I got to about step 2 in which I was informed that 2 people are required to lift out the backseat. Foiled! You see, if I weren't pregnant, I would not have been deterred by this minor detail. What many deem a 2-person job can easily be turned into a 1-person job with a little ingenuity.
But not when you are pregnant. There are some things my body just won't let me do right now, and let me tell you, it really ticks me off!
6/27/11
Mommy Moments
I fill our days. In my efforts to ensure the kids are happy, healthy, physically active, socially capable, and mentally stimulated, I tend to overbook us. All of us. So much so, that recently Aaron boycotted a dinner date with friends. While I was upset at first, when I took a step back, I had to agree with him. Sometimes it needs to be just us.
I have a very hard time striking a balance. I tell myself that social interaction is good for the kids, that they have more fun with their friends than the do with their huge, often tired, very pregnant mommy, that it will give me a chance to relax. However, today I noticed some errors with those assumptions. I realized that when I schedule a play date at our home, I kill myself trying to make sure the place is picked up and sanitized. I realized that sometimes, the kids just want to stay home and play. I realized that they still think I can be fun, and they still want to play with me (even when I'm often tired and grumpy)...That one brought tears to my eyes. It dawned on me that we are constantly in the company of others (friends, cousins, grandparents, etc.); so much so that we are missing out on each other.
Last night I emailed the mother of one of Parker's preschool buddies to see if they'd like to join us at the Science Center today since it was supposed to rain. Luckily I didn't mention this to Parker because I didn't hear back from her before we left this morning.
I have to admit, I wasn't exactly thrilled at the prospect of taking the kids to the Science Center by myself (9 months pregnant), but as we fed the parking meter and skipped [they skipped, I waddled] toward the entrance, I found myself getting excited, too. I had a strange deja vu sensation. It reminded me of living in Seattle. We went places with friends, but I often took the kids out by myself. With no family around, we were frequently on our own.
There is something so refreshing about really watching your kids play. When it's just me with them, I am so much more engaged. I was on the floor building tubular creations, making pyramids out of foam blocks, and launching catapults. It was awesome! The kids had my undivided attention, and I loved every second...Well, every second until Maddie clawed Parker's face because he took over her computer game (at which time we all exited in a large, sobbing, whining lump of arms and legs).
By the time we were on the sidewalk again, they were skipping along. The whole trip was such a wonderful, eye-opening experience. It felt like a gift from God - realizing the kids are just that...gifts. They are not just responsibilities, little people to be educated, entertained, and cared for. They are here to enjoy me, and for me to enjoy as well.
I'm looking at my calendar in a whole new light. Time to book some "mommy moments" and "family weekends." I'm grateful to be learning this lesson while the kids are so young!
I have a very hard time striking a balance. I tell myself that social interaction is good for the kids, that they have more fun with their friends than the do with their huge, often tired, very pregnant mommy, that it will give me a chance to relax. However, today I noticed some errors with those assumptions. I realized that when I schedule a play date at our home, I kill myself trying to make sure the place is picked up and sanitized. I realized that sometimes, the kids just want to stay home and play. I realized that they still think I can be fun, and they still want to play with me (even when I'm often tired and grumpy)...That one brought tears to my eyes. It dawned on me that we are constantly in the company of others (friends, cousins, grandparents, etc.); so much so that we are missing out on each other.
Last night I emailed the mother of one of Parker's preschool buddies to see if they'd like to join us at the Science Center today since it was supposed to rain. Luckily I didn't mention this to Parker because I didn't hear back from her before we left this morning.
I have to admit, I wasn't exactly thrilled at the prospect of taking the kids to the Science Center by myself (9 months pregnant), but as we fed the parking meter and skipped [they skipped, I waddled] toward the entrance, I found myself getting excited, too. I had a strange deja vu sensation. It reminded me of living in Seattle. We went places with friends, but I often took the kids out by myself. With no family around, we were frequently on our own.
There is something so refreshing about really watching your kids play. When it's just me with them, I am so much more engaged. I was on the floor building tubular creations, making pyramids out of foam blocks, and launching catapults. It was awesome! The kids had my undivided attention, and I loved every second...Well, every second until Maddie clawed Parker's face because he took over her computer game (at which time we all exited in a large, sobbing, whining lump of arms and legs).
By the time we were on the sidewalk again, they were skipping along. The whole trip was such a wonderful, eye-opening experience. It felt like a gift from God - realizing the kids are just that...gifts. They are not just responsibilities, little people to be educated, entertained, and cared for. They are here to enjoy me, and for me to enjoy as well.
I'm looking at my calendar in a whole new light. Time to book some "mommy moments" and "family weekends." I'm grateful to be learning this lesson while the kids are so young!
6/12/11
Dear Jack
Dear Jack,
According to my due date calendar, we are going to get to meet you in 46 short days. I just wanted to let you know how excited we all are about your arrival. I want you to know that your dad and I prayed about having you and were thrilled when we found out we were going to be your parents. I want you to know that even though we already have a boy, you are precious and special to us.
Your big brother, Parker, and big sister, Maddie are anxious to meet you. One night as I was cuddling with Parker before bedtime, he inched his way down from my shoulder to my belly button and snuggled against it. I was confused until he explained to me he was cuddling with you, too. Every night when I tuck Maddie in, she calls out, "G'night, Baby Jack!" They both like to give you kisses (through my belly) and to feel you move around. Whenever you kick and their hands are on my stomach to feel it, they laugh and squeal, "He punched me!" Maddie wants to give you a bottle, a bath, and teach you how to go camping. Parker wants to play with you and loves feeding me so that you can eat whatever he gives me through the umbilical cord (but he still calls it an extension cord sometimes).
I have been getting your room ready. I hope you like sock monkeys! They are everywhere. I painted some words on your wall (and will soon paint the monkeys dangling off the words). I put your tiny clothes away and postioned a comfy chair near the window where you will eat and we will cuddle. I love you so much already, little guy. Thanks for joining our family!
5/23/11
M & M time
I'm not talking about candy. I'm referring to something I love even more than chocolate [hard to imagine, right?]. M & M time is Mommy and Maddie time.
When I signed Parker up for preschool last year, I assumed that his 3 hours away from home on Tuesdays and Thursdays would be filled with tea parties, make-up sessions, reading, and cuddle time with Maddie. Then I realized how incredibly easy it was to get things accomplished when there is only one child in my charge. Suddenly I could unload the dishwasher and start a load of laundry before lunch time. Imagine! When I found that she didn't complain about car rides and errands when it was just the two of us, the possibilities were endless...dry cleaners, grocery, library, oh my!
I got greedy. I started to fill all of "Maddie's" time with chores and errands, convincing myself we had quality conversations along the way. I read her extra books before nap time and bedtime to cover my guilt. The complaining began. It was inevitable, really. "I don't want to go to the store!" I had ruined it.
Well, Thursday was a crazy one. It was Parker's last day of preschool, and the 3 hour window just didn't seem long enough. I was running around trying to finish the small, movie-themed gift baskets I had made for his teachers. I had so many stops to make, I thought my head might explode. Maddie whined her complaints from the backseat as I drove like a madwoman all over town. I just wanted some silly movie tickets! The theaters weren't open yet, Walmart didn't carry them, Blockbuster had stopped selling gift cards temporarily due to a corporate takeover. AAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!
We stopped at Stonybrook theaters around 10:30. When I saw that they were closed, I decided to duck into the nearby Steak-n-Shake, so Maddie and I could take a potty break. Once inside, I reasoned we might as well stay until 11, to give the theatre a chance to open. Best. Decision. Ever.
I realized what I had been missing. This was real Mommy/Maddie time. We sat in a booth and just played. With nary a dish to wash, shirt to fold, or toy to put away, I turned off my phone and mental to-do list, and was able to focus completely on my little princess. We each ordered chocolate milk (a rare treat). She talked in her loud [read: oblivious to others], high-pitched voice, eliciting smiles from the other patrons. We shook the sugar packets like maracas, took turns wearing her hot pink feather boa, and had an impromptu tea party with the plastic dishes she had lugged in from the van. She danced to the 80's music, and hugged the candy machine, informing me it was her "best fwiend" after it dispensed some sweet treats. We chatted about nothing and sang silly songs. We didn't have a care in the world.
At 11, we were ready to go. The theatre still wasn't open. What might have seemed like a waste of time to a casual observer was actually the best 30 minutes I have spent with my baby in a long time. What a lesson I learned! I just hope I can remember it.
When I signed Parker up for preschool last year, I assumed that his 3 hours away from home on Tuesdays and Thursdays would be filled with tea parties, make-up sessions, reading, and cuddle time with Maddie. Then I realized how incredibly easy it was to get things accomplished when there is only one child in my charge. Suddenly I could unload the dishwasher and start a load of laundry before lunch time. Imagine! When I found that she didn't complain about car rides and errands when it was just the two of us, the possibilities were endless...dry cleaners, grocery, library, oh my!
I got greedy. I started to fill all of "Maddie's" time with chores and errands, convincing myself we had quality conversations along the way. I read her extra books before nap time and bedtime to cover my guilt. The complaining began. It was inevitable, really. "I don't want to go to the store!" I had ruined it.
Well, Thursday was a crazy one. It was Parker's last day of preschool, and the 3 hour window just didn't seem long enough. I was running around trying to finish the small, movie-themed gift baskets I had made for his teachers. I had so many stops to make, I thought my head might explode. Maddie whined her complaints from the backseat as I drove like a madwoman all over town. I just wanted some silly movie tickets! The theaters weren't open yet, Walmart didn't carry them, Blockbuster had stopped selling gift cards temporarily due to a corporate takeover. AAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!
We stopped at Stonybrook theaters around 10:30. When I saw that they were closed, I decided to duck into the nearby Steak-n-Shake, so Maddie and I could take a potty break. Once inside, I reasoned we might as well stay until 11, to give the theatre a chance to open. Best. Decision. Ever.
I realized what I had been missing. This was real Mommy/Maddie time. We sat in a booth and just played. With nary a dish to wash, shirt to fold, or toy to put away, I turned off my phone and mental to-do list, and was able to focus completely on my little princess. We each ordered chocolate milk (a rare treat). She talked in her loud [read: oblivious to others], high-pitched voice, eliciting smiles from the other patrons. We shook the sugar packets like maracas, took turns wearing her hot pink feather boa, and had an impromptu tea party with the plastic dishes she had lugged in from the van. She danced to the 80's music, and hugged the candy machine, informing me it was her "best fwiend" after it dispensed some sweet treats. We chatted about nothing and sang silly songs. We didn't have a care in the world.
At 11, we were ready to go. The theatre still wasn't open. What might have seemed like a waste of time to a casual observer was actually the best 30 minutes I have spent with my baby in a long time. What a lesson I learned! I just hope I can remember it.
5/14/11
Clothing Wars
Why are my kids so opposed to clothing? Perhaps a more accurate question would be: Why are they so opposed to wearing clothing appropriately? I really don't understand. I have tried to explain that when worn properly, clothes offer protection from wind, rain, scratchy things, etc. It doesn't seem to matter. Parker will wear clothes during the day, but at night, he insists on being nude. When we have sitters, we make him wear pj's but allow him to forgo the underwear. I guess he overheard us calling it "going commando," because the other day he informed me he was "going komodo" to school. Um, no.
Maddie is a wild card. She vacillates between wearing multiple layers of mismatched clothes, wearing nothing, and refusing to wear bottoms of any sort. The other day I went into the house to make lunch, keeping an ear on the kids through the open window as they played on the swing set. When I exited the house minutes later, Maddie's pants and underwear were MIA. When asked where they were, she grinned and innocently replied, "I don't know." Yeah.
The worst part is that she is completely immodest [and oblivious to others]. We had dinner guests one night, and Maddie (who was previously clothed) bounded down the stairs and into the kitchen sans bottoms. She grinned up at everyone and ran in circles. If you combine her affinity for body art, preference to remain naked, refusal to brush her hair, love of spinning, and complete lack of coordination, she could be mistaken for a drunken, tattooed Tasmanian devil most days.
Oh well, at least I'm getting some great wedding slide show shots.
Maddie is a wild card. She vacillates between wearing multiple layers of mismatched clothes, wearing nothing, and refusing to wear bottoms of any sort. The other day I went into the house to make lunch, keeping an ear on the kids through the open window as they played on the swing set. When I exited the house minutes later, Maddie's pants and underwear were MIA. When asked where they were, she grinned and innocently replied, "I don't know." Yeah.
The worst part is that she is completely immodest [and oblivious to others]. We had dinner guests one night, and Maddie (who was previously clothed) bounded down the stairs and into the kitchen sans bottoms. She grinned up at everyone and ran in circles. If you combine her affinity for body art, preference to remain naked, refusal to brush her hair, love of spinning, and complete lack of coordination, she could be mistaken for a drunken, tattooed Tasmanian devil most days.
Oh well, at least I'm getting some great wedding slide show shots.
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